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When it comes to a couple that’s tying the knot again, navigating wedding gift etiquette can be tricky. After all, they’re not exactly starting from scratch, but you still want to celebrate their love. Luckily, the rules and expectations for gift-giving for a second marriage may differ from those of a first marriage...but not by much.
Keep reading to learn some tips and guidelines to help you navigate wedding guest etiquette for a second marriage, so you can be sure to show your support and celebrate the couple's love.
general second marriage wedding etiquette
If they say “your present is the presence” you can honor that by not bringing a present and by ensuring your presence is supportive, respectful and contributes to the joy of their day.
Wedding guest etiquette for a second marriage registry can vary depending on the couple's preferences and the circumstances surrounding their wedding, but ultimately, the most important thing is to show your support and celebrate the couple's love and commitment to each other. Here are a few tips for second marriage wedding etiquette:
RSVP PROMPTLY
When you receive an invitation, RSVP as soon as possible so that the couple can get an accurate headcount for their wedding. This will also help them plan their seating chart and other details.
BE RESPECTFUL
A second marriage can be a sensitive subject, so it's important to be respectful to the couple and their guests. Avoid making any negative comments or comparisons to their previous marriage.
DRESS APPROPRIATELY
As with any wedding, it’s important to stick to the dress code. Check the invitation for any guidance or check in with the couple to learn more.
SHOULD YOU GIVE A GIFT TO THE CHILDREN FROM THE PREVIOUS MARRIAGE?
While not necessary, it is up to the discretion of the gift-giver to give the children of the previous marriage a present. If you’re extremely close with the couple, you might feel inclined to give their children something, too. This might include a gift card or an experience that the whole family could enjoy.
second marriage cash wedding gifts
The average wedding gift amount is $100, which is a solid place to start when thinking about how much to spend on a wedding gift. From there, add or subtract depending on how close you are with the couple, and how far you may be traveling to attend their wedding. At some points in your life, you might not have the budget to spend very much on a wedding gift, and that’s okay. Here, we break down how much to spend on a wedding gift, depending on all these factors.
$20–$50
When it comes to acquaintances and coworkers, you’re not expected to spend a very large amount on a wedding gift, especially if you’re attending solo. Also, if you’re younger or just out of college, spending $20–$50 on a friend’s wedding might be just right, depending on your budget.
$50–$100
In general, most wedding gift amounts should fall in this range, especially if you’re buying a wedding gift for a cousin, friend or coworker or not bringing a plus one.
$100–$250
You should expect to spend within this wedding gift range for close family members and dear friends, especially if the gift is coming from you and your wedding date.
$250–$500
If it’s within budget, spending between $250 and $500 much on a wedding gift is customary for relatives of the couple. Or, if a high-price item appears on a wedding registry, you can contribute to a group gift within this range. (More on group gifting in a moment!)
$500+
Spending $500 or more on a wedding gift is not expected, and would customarily come from close friends and family.
second marriage wedding gift ideas
If the couple has chosen to have a wedding registry for their second marriage, it is important to respect their wishes and consider purchasing a gift from the registry.
However, if they have chosen not to have a registry, it is still appropriate to give a wedding gift, but you may need to be more creative in selecting a meaningful and thoughtful gift. (More on that later). Read on to learn more wedding etiquette tips for a second marriage.
WEDDING GIFT IDEAS FOR OLDER COUPLES
An older couple getting married for the second time might already have most of what they need in terms of furniture and kitchen appliances. Gift them something personal, like monogrammed kitchen or bath towels.
WEDDING GIFT IDEAS FOR BLENDED FAMILIES
While not necessary, wedding gifts can include the kids—especially for blended families! This is an opportunity to give them something unique, like a shared experience the entire family can enjoy. Consider a gift card to their favorite restaurant or tickets to a show. If not that, go in on a group gift with other guests. Group gifting is an easy way to contribute to a more expensive wedding gift.
WEDDING GIFT IDEAS FOR VOW RENEWALS
Typically, couples who are renewing their vows do not have a registry or even expect to receive gifts from their guests. If you are especially close with the couple, you may consider giving them something small and personal, like engraved his-and-hers champagne glasses or make a donation to a charity of their choice. Even a simple, heartfelt card would suffice as a gift for a couple renewing their vows.
Ultimately, every wedding is unique. Follow the couple’s lead and respect their wishes, whether it's for the ceremony, the reception, or any other aspect of the day. Above all, be supportive and celebrate their love and commitment to each other…and have fun!